How to Tell People You're Pregnant
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I’m so happy to finally share how Nick and I told people we were expecting. I’ve had this on docket since we started telling people I was pregnant, but between nausea and other pregnancy woes, I just hadn’t gotten around to it. This is going to be more of a fun post rather than a serious post; however, I do think I should bring back my Women in the Workplace series for a special post on how to tell your boss / office you are pregnant, as that is quite a bit different. I’ve seen some (male) reactions that aren’t so great, but that is a story for another day.
Keep reading if you’re looking for pregnancy announcement ideas / a special way to inform your family, friends, and loved ones of your exciting news!
HOW I FOUND OUT
I use the Fertility Awareness Method, so I was able to kind of figure it out fairly early. I took a test as soon as possible at 4 weeks, but had a hunch / a couple dreams about it around 3 weeks / a week prior.
HOW I TOLD MY HUSBAND
I took my first test on February 13th. Knowing that I wanted to be sure and wait at least another day, I didn’t tell Nick yet. On February 14th I took another test and there it was - positive again. This just happened to be Valentine’s Day, so I incorporated it into Nick’s V-day gift. I grabbed an envelope and wrote “early Valentine’s Day gift for next year”, then slipped the positive pregnancy test in it and placed it in the bottom of the gift sack. It was the last gift he opened that day and was so sweet! Because of this the code name for the baby became “Valentine”, which later turned into “Valentines”.
HOW WE TOLD MY PARENTS AND SISTER
We told them earlier than I would have wanted to share and before we knew we were having twins ~ around 6/7 weeks. This was around the same time I had a miscarriage last year. They came in town in March (I live in CA and they live in TX) and I had HORRIBLE nausea and was vomiting constantly. There wasn’t really a way I could hide it, so I went ahead and shared the news. I told them on a Friday and Sunday I went to the ER thinking I was miscarrying again, but actually wasn’t. I went into this in more detail here, but basically my husband and my mom found out about the twins via text message and then I told my sister and dad once back from the hospital. I said something along the lines of “the doctors said the heartbeats were good… yes I said heartbeatS - plural … it is twins.” It was a bit of a shock since I very much thought I was miscarrying, so I think they were expecting dismal news and ready for the worst.
How we told them initially was with little felt ornaments. They were Christmas gifts that I had purchased during my previous pregnancy, but never got to distribute. They symbolized the names my family wanted to be called once a baby was born - Bee (a bumblebee- my mom), Buck (a deer - my dad), and Auntie Em (Toto from The Wizard of OZ - my sister). I wanted to give gifts that were items that they would want to keep / be symbolic. They were so sweet! I kind of played it off as “oh I got these for you for Christmas, but they came in late”. The lightbulb went off in my mom and sister’s head, but didn’t hit my dad until a little later. The reaction was a bit slow just because of my previous miscarriage / it is a sensitive topic, but I’m so glad we got to tell them in person and in a memorable way.
Douglas Slowpoke Sloth in bunny outfit | Compartes Chocolate Covered Peeps (offered every Easter season)
HOW WE TOLD NICK’S PARENTS AND SISTERS
We tried really hard to be able to tell them all in person, but it just didn’t work out. You can only ask people to come in town so many times before it becomes suspicious ;) We were able to tell one of his sisters in person, but had to do the others virtually.
We told his sister who is local first, just because we were being weird / having to cancel plans because of my morning sickness. She loves sloths and stuffed animals, so we went that route. It was right before Easter when we told her, so we actually found these cute sloths dressed up as Easter bunnies and played it off as an early Easter gift. We wrote a note that said “ Dear Auntie Sophie, can you please hold onto these for us until October? We love you already!” Nick didn’t want to outright say we were having twins, so it was a fun way for us to hint at it / have her figure it out.
We told his parents and his other sister at the same time via different avenues, but both food items! It was Easter, so for his other sister, we sent 2 chocolate dipped Peep marshmallows from Compartes, a local LA chocolatier. They were supposed to deliver a gift message, but didn’t include one, so we kind of had to say it rather than her infer it from the note, but it was still fun. Re: his parents, we sent them cookies from one of my favorite Dallas bakers - Cookie Culture. I found her on Etsy a couple years ago and I love how her cookies are pretty and actually taste good. She was doing special Easter orders and one of the designs was a chick popping out of an egg. We ordered 2 and wrote “More Mulenoses” on one and “October 2021” on the other. It was fun to watch them try and figure it out, as it wasn’t completely obvious it was about a baby nor was it clear it was twins.
HOW WE TOLD OTHER PEOPLE
Immediate family is all we told in the first 11 weeks and we had them keep it a secret and didn’t tell anyone else until I hit 13 / 14 weeks. We facetimed Nick’s grandparents and told them to expect twins this fall, then called other family members. We told some friends at this point as well, though some we waited to text until we found out the genders a couple weeks later. For those we sent a picture of us and our “gender reveal cake”. For my extended family we waited until I was 16 weeks and the only reason we did that is because I was in town for a family wedding and everyone was going to be together. I am a big fan of telling people in person, so opted for that, versus sooner. We had a family brunch the day after the wedding and I gave my Mimi a Dr. Seuss book One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish and wrote a poem inside that said “ You’re already a great-grand mimi, this we know is true. How about we spice it up and add a thing or TWO? If you’re up for the challenge, I’m sure they’ll put you to the test… soon to be a TWIN Mimi and we think you’ll be the best!” We gave it to her privately, and then she read it to the rest of the family. I picked the book in honor of my late grandfather who loved to fish, along with the fact that it references TWO fish and we were announcing twins. Additionally, my Mimi loves books and used to have a bookstore, so it was all very fitting.
HOW WE TOLD THE INTERNET
Because of my previous miscarriage, I waited a little longer than most do. I announced the pregnancy around 16 / 17 weeks, after I told my extended family. I announced we were having twins a week later. The beach is a special place for us, so we had some photos taken there. I arranged sea shells we had collected over the time we have lived in Los Angeles and arranged them in the shape of a heart over my stomach. To announce “twins” we wrote it in the sand. It felt special / different / not overdone and I love how we shared it!
I hope this gave you inspiration for how to share your pregnancy! My main tip is don’t stress too much / overthink it. Think of ways you can make the announcement YOU and/or how you can make it special for other people. Considering what they like and what is sentimental to them is very helpful in brainstorming ways. Something I knew I didn’t want to do was spend money on somewhat useless trinkets or t-shirts that I didn’t think would get worn or used. In regard to all gifts, I like to figure out things that people will actually use and keep, otherwise it feels like I’m wasting my money. Happy brainstorming! XOXO